Individual Counseling Archives | Valencia Christian Counseling

When Men Get Postpartum Depression

When Men Get Postpartum Depression

Cyndi Kay Green2025-03-11T16:57:36+00:00March 7th, 2025|Depression, Featured, Individual Counseling, Men’s Issues|

When we discuss postpartum depression, we typically think about women. But the reality is that men can also be affected by postpartum depression. Bringing a baby into the family is a big change for everyone. Though the dad may not experience the pain, there is still the struggle with exhaustion and stress that come with having a newborn in the home. These are a normal part of the birth of a child. However, they can lead to the onset of symptoms that are in line with postpartum depression. Valencia Christian Counseling can provide support and guidance to help navigate this season of life. It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you; He will not leave you nor forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed. – Deuteronomy 31:8, ESV Factors That Play a Role in Postpartum Depression Men who suffer from postpartum depression usually notice the symptoms when the baby is three to six months old. Various factors play a part in male postpartum depression. Moms who are depressed When the mom shows signs of postpartum depression, about half of the men will begin to show signs of depression, as well. Sleep deprivation It is no secret that new parents struggle with proper sleep right after the birth of the baby. This deprivation can cause depression and anxiety Hormones Men can experience a change in testosterone levels after the birth of a baby. Feeling of disconnection from mom and the newborn Dads sometimes feel disconnected due to the mom being more hands-on and focused on bonding. Family history of depression If there is a history of depression, the male is more likely to experience postpartum depression. Adjusting to parenthood Becoming a parent can seem overwhelming. Parenting requires the ability to cope with many changes. [...]

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Adverse Childhood Experiences and Abandonment Issues in Relationships

Adverse Childhood Experiences and Abandonment Issues in Relationships

Kate Motaung2025-03-11T17:13:55+00:00January 22nd, 2025|Abandonment and Neglect, Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues|

Childhood is meant to be a time of exploration, growth, and fun as a child finds their way in the world. Unfortunately, that isn’t every child’s story. Children struggle and go through tough hardships such as abandonment issues in relationships just like adults. Those experiences can affect their development, how they form bonds, and how they relate to other people. Abandonment Issues in Relationships The term “attachment style” refers to how a person is able to form emotional bonds with others, and the kinds of expectations they carry with them into those relationships. There are four main attachment styles, which are: secure, avoidant-dismissive, anxious or ambivalent, and disorganized attachment styles. These styles describe the ways people interact with others and behave in relationships. Valencia Christian Counseling can help individuals explore their attachment styles and develop healthier relationship patterns. When a person experiences consistent care, they are more confident that their needs will be met. This will typically lead to a secure form of attachment. This type of attachment leads to expectations that others will be responsive to their needs, and they can feel safe with others. If this sense of confidence is forged during a critical development period such as infancy, childhood, and adolescence, it will have a lasting impact. Abandonment issues vary, but they all typically stem from not having one’s needs met consistently or being subjected to unhealthy patterns of behavior during the formative years. These may cause a person to be wary of others, to struggle with closeness with loved ones, to be unwilling to be vulnerable in sharing thoughts and feelings with others, and preemptively sabotage relationships to avoid being abandoned. A person with an insecure attachment style may have a hard time trusting their partner, and they may be clingy and require constant reassurance [...]

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Bipolar Schizophrenia Versus Schizoaffective Disorder

Bipolar Schizophrenia Versus Schizoaffective Disorder

Sandra Stein2025-03-11T17:18:35+00:00December 10th, 2024|Bipolar Disorder, Featured, Individual Counseling|

Is bipolar schizophrenia a thing? The answer is yes and no. Bipolar disorder is characterized by extreme shifts in mood, energy level, and thinking, whereas schizophrenia causes a person to lose touch with reality. They are two separate and distinct mental health conditions, and the diagnosis of one typically excludes the other. However, there are rare cases where a person exhibits symptoms of both schizophrenia and bipolar disorder at the same time. When that happens, however, it is not diagnosed as bipolar schizophrenia, but rather as bipolar schizoaffective disorder. What is schizoaffective disorder? Schizoaffective disorder is an uncommon, chronic, mental health condition that dramatically affects the way a person thinks and copes with his or her day-to-day life. It is characterized by a mix of schizophrenic symptoms such as delusions, hallucinations, and disorganized thinking, combined with either bipolar mania or depression (schizoaffective disorder bipolar type), or a major depressive disorder (schizoaffective disorder, depressive type). Because the condition is so rare, getting the right diagnosis can be challenging. Schizoaffective disorder is one of the most frequently misdiagnosed psychiatric disorders in clinical practice and is often misidentified as schizophrenia or bipolar disorder. Valencia Christian Counseling provides guidance and support for those navigating complex mental health conditions. How is bipolar schizoaffective disorder diagnosed? There are two steps to diagnosing bipolar schizoaffective disorder. The first one is a medical evaluation to rule out any other physical or neurological condition that might be causing the symptoms. The other focuses on the diagnostic criteria of the disorder. According to the American Psychiatric Association’s Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5-TR), for a person to be diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder bipolar type, he or she needs to meet the following criteria. The person must have an uninterrupted period of illness during which he or she [...]

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Examples of Professional Boundaries and Why They Matter

Examples of Professional Boundaries and Why They Matter

Kate Motaung2025-03-11T17:30:16+00:00October 1st, 2024|Coaching, Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development, Professional Development|

Work is a good thing, even though it can be hard or feel unrewarding at times. A person’s work can provide a sense of meaning and an outlet for their creative gifts, and it allows them to provide for themselves and their family. However, work can take over one’s life and transgress professional boundaries, occupying more space than it should. This can have detrimental effects on a person’s health as well as their relationships. Having a decent work-life balance helps to minimize the negative effects of work taking over one’s life. Maintaining that balance requires reliable professional boundaries. Valencia Christian Counseling can provide guidance on setting healthy boundaries and achieving a fulfilling balance. Understanding boundaries A physical boundary is a line of some kind that tells you where one thing ends, and another begins. A boundary could be the walls of your apartment which distinguishes your space from your neighbor’s space. If you have a parking space at work, the boundary that marks your spot out is usually a set of lines and an inscription that indicates what you have exclusive access to. In our relationships, we won’t often have physical lines that work the same way, but that doesn’t mean boundaries don’t exist or that they don’t matter. When it comes to how we relate to others, boundaries are, according to the American Psychological Association, “a psychological demarcation that protects the integrity of an individual or group or that helps the person or group set realistic limits on participation in a relationship or activity.” A boundary says, in effect, “This is me, and this is you.” We are all made uniquely in God’s image, with our opinions, values, abilities, personalities, tolerances, loves, pet peeves, and everything that makes us who we are. These are what distinguish us from the [...]

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Do You Need a Certified Life Coach?

Do You Need a Certified Life Coach?

Melissa Plantz2025-03-11T17:54:39+00:00August 29th, 2024|Coaching, Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development, Professional Development, Spiritual Development|

In a world of constant changes and transitions, you don’t have to navigate it alone. While friends and family can be a great source of support, there are limitations. They may offer advice that isn’t always helpful or overlook issues that could hinder your progress. This is where a certified life coach can step in. A certified life coach is an expert in a particular area based on their own experiences. Unlike a counselor or therapist, a certified life coach does not diagnose or treat mental health conditions. Instead, they focus on posing questions, active listening, and suggesting steps to help you reach your goals. Why you should consider a certified life coach. A life coach can be anyone who uses their skills, past experiences, and successes to help others reach their goals in the same area of expertise. The industry for life coaches is unregulated, but a certified life coach has the added advantage of having taken the required training and learned skills to communicate effectively with various people. Valencia Christian Counseling offers faith-based guidance to help individuals grow and achieve their goals with clarity and purpose. If you plan to make a major change in your life or see if it is possible, a certified life coach can help you get started. You can find a coach in just about any industry. For example, if you are trying to lose weight and get healthy after years of dieting, a certified life coach in the health and wellness arena could help you set goals, choose one goal to focus on, and create a plan. As you progress toward your goal, the life coach supports you by checking in and helping you reassess and adjust, as necessary. What a certified life coach could do for you You want to [...]

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Healthy Ways of Finding Self-Acceptance

Healthy Ways of Finding Self-Acceptance

Jennifer Kooshian2025-03-12T09:37:15+00:00August 27th, 2024|Coaching, Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development|

In your lifetime, there will only be a small group of people who can say that they’ve known you for most of your life. Your folks, older relatives, your siblings, and some friends from the neighborhood that you’ve somehow managed to stay in touch with will be among these. As we go through life, relationships end and we part ways with people, and by the time one is 25-40, there’s typically only a small circle of people we truly know and trust, which makes self-acceptance important. Of course, as you go throughout life, you’re doing it with and as yourself. In whatever situation you find yourself in, you’re bringing your thoughts, hopes, dreams, deepest fears, gifts, and everything that you are. As you make decisions, work, engage in relationships, have conflicts, make up, and apologize, you do these things in accordance with your values or beliefs, though sometimes you may choose to compromise. Valencia Christian Counseling helps individuals navigate life’s challenges while staying true to their faith and values. Whatever else happens in your other relationships, you should be able to live with yourself at the end of the day. Being able to accept yourself and be content is such an amazing gift because it has many implications for your well-being. The struggle for self-acceptance Self-acceptance allows you to face the world with confidence, and it also allows you to be more impervious to criticism. When you accept yourself, you see yourself for who you are without pretense or judgment. You can recognize your own strengths, accomplishments, and weaknesses, and you can see your value and see yourself with sober judgment without needing the approval of others. Accepting yourself helps you to navigate the world better without the harsh background noise of what other people think. You’re [...]

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Surprising Facts about Anxiety and Panic Attacks that Everyone Needs to Know

Surprising Facts about Anxiety and Panic Attacks that Everyone Needs to Know

Grace Mavindidze2025-03-13T07:19:21+00:00July 5th, 2024|Anxiety, Featured, Individual Counseling, Men’s Issues, Women’s Issues|

Most of us have heard about anxiety or panic attacks and believe we know exactly what they mean. However, if you have never experienced those symptoms, you might be surprised and realize how little we know. I’m sure no one alive four years ago will ever forget where they were, what they did, who they were with, or how they felt when the world was rocked to the core by the catastrophic COVID-19 pandemic. To be honest, many of us initially ignored those first reports, alerts, and warnings, chalking them off to media gimmicks and overdramatization. Valencia Christian Counseling offers support for those still processing the emotional and mental impact of this life-altering event. Remember, none of us had experienced a pandemic before in our lifetime, so the concept was rather foreign to us. Seemingly overnight, we all realized that we knew someone who was sick, hospitalized, had lost someone, or had lost their lives. Millions of people experienced anxiety or panic attacks, much to their surprise. Fact 1: Even the strongest can have anxiety or panic attacks As dreadful as the situation can be, many can convince themselves that they are the strong ones emotionally, invulnerable to attack. Even while helping others, organizing things for the community, or being the face of strength and reliability, people can still have a panic attack. One such woman reports being a community leader and being taken by surprise by a panic attack. She reports the memories of the day are still crystal clear in her mind. She remembers waking up feeling like she had fallen into moving water with a strange, wave-like feeling. She kept getting intense chest pains that would grip her suddenly and subside within a few minutes. She was shaking and sweating profusely. Her heart was racing and [...]

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Anger in the Book of Proverbs

Anger in the Book of Proverbs

Wade Van Staden2025-03-13T07:37:32+00:00May 29th, 2024|Anger Issues, Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues, Spiritual Development|

The Bible offers much wisdom when it comes to understanding emotions and mental health. Proverbs, especially, has a lot to say on the topic of anger. The timeless truths in the book of Proverbs are well worth unpacking and examining because many apply to the situations we face today. A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger - Proverbs 15:1, NIV We must all face conflict at some point in our lives. This can be a scary thing for many of us, especially those who grew up in homes that never experienced shouting, harsh words, or arguments. Valencia Christian Counseling can help you develop healthy communication and conflict-resolution skills rooted in faith and understanding. A benefit of being conflict-avoidant is that gentle communication is often the very thing that de-escalates a fiery exchange. Answering an angry person softly and being gentle with your words will catch the person off-guard and create space for calmer communication. Better a patient person than a warrior, one with self-control than one who takes a city - Proverbs 16:32, NIV It can feel empowering to vent anger because doing so will often get results. For example, bosses often express their anger at employees because they are in a position of power and may get away with it without losing their jobs. However, it will come at a cost. The atmosphere in the workplace will be affected, not to mention the mental health of the workers. Mature leaders know that valuing relationships is better for the longevity of business. The angry boss would do better to take time to investigate what frustrates him and communicate from a place of knowledge rather than anger. This principle applies to all types of relationships. Cool heads and patience will always prevail over outbursts [...]

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Taking New Territory: Navigating Transition, Relationships, and Boundaries

Taking New Territory: Navigating Transition, Relationships, and Boundaries

Kate Motaung2025-03-13T07:48:55+00:00April 29th, 2024|Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues|

Venturing into unfamiliar territory can be somewhat frightening, but it is part of a maturing believer’s evolution and transformation. As we discover more about the Lord we encounter who He has called and created us to be. In this, we come to rest and rely on Him as He winds our path out of familiarity and deeper into the unknown where faith alone sustains, helping us to set proper boundaries. Abram and Sarai experienced this as they sojourned through unfamiliar territory in search of a promised homeland. Having left most of their family except for Lot, Abraham’s nephew, they weren’t sure of all the future would produce. What they discovered was a handful of promises from the Almighty and a yearning for a city whose builder and maker was God (Hebrews 11:8, 10). Transition Abraham’s story is one that we all live in some way or another. Transitions are built into life’s landscape. As we traverse from one season into the next, we will separate from some places and some people while engaging with new ones. Sometimes, when we carry elements of our old life into new spaces, we find disagreement and a lack of fit. It demands that we respond by making another change. Otherwise, we can experience the discord that often ensues when we cling to what the Lord wants us to leave in the old season. Valencia Christian Counseling can provide guidance in navigating life transitions with faith and clarity. Territory Though he left the majority of his family, Abraham pivoted again. This time, it meant creating a boundary and separating his people, property, and possessions from Lot. When we first consider this, it can appear as if Abraham is being harsh in setting a boundary. If we read more closely, we will see that he [...]

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Bible Verses about Friendship and Community

Bible Verses about Friendship and Community

Caitlin Mallery2025-03-13T08:03:15+00:00April 22nd, 2024|Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues, Spiritual Development|

Looking for Bible verses about friendship and community? If so, this article is for you. Lack of friendship and a sense of community produces loneliness which is currently one of the greatest crises on both a national and international level. “The World Health Organization (WHO) has declared loneliness to be a pressing global health threat, with the US surgeon general saying that its mortality effects are equivalent to smoking 15 cigarettes a day.” As people become more transitory in their lives, work for large corporations from their dining rooms, and their social lives consist of scrolling social media, a life of loneliness is easy to slip into. However, both medical and psychological science have done a great deal of research on the importance of relationships in human beings. Valencia Christian Counseling offers support in fostering meaningful connections and overcoming loneliness through faith-based guidance. This is not just in terms of marital and familial relationships. A community of friends and neighbors supporting and caring for one another is vital in the truest sense of the word, life-giving. Not all relationships and friendships are equally intimate, but they should all offer something of value, whether it be a neighbor to watch your pets when you are away, weekly small groups or book clubs, or the larger community of a church. Bible Verses About Friendship and Community What Jesus said Jesus created a group of intimate friends to share in the work of the kingdom of God. And the identifying marker of that kingdom is loving one another. A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another. – John 13:34-35, NIV Your brothers and sisters in [...]

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